Friday, February 10, 2012
Why Online Dating Sites are So Popular
Online dating is one aspect of the Internet revolution that most of us love. When you reflect on the entire concept of meeting someone on an Online Dating Site, you just have to admire how much it totally simplifies the entire process of meeting people. We can browse pictures before we even talk to them, centre on the cuties and ignore the rest. No struggling for an opening gambit, no long silences when you struggle to come up with an answer to their comments dissing something that you feel strongly in favour of – none of that crap. You no longer have to dodge the "just before closing time" desperation moves from people that you would just as soon avoid. Even better is the fact that if you have a bad reaction to them you do not have to take pains to hide your feelings from showing on your face.
One thing that baffles me about online dating, unlike dating, is how brash and open the profiles are. I mean, sure, honesty is what you want in a guy/girl. But sometimes I'd rather wait until at least a few dates in to find out about their fetishes, their ex-wives, their baby momma drama or their invisible friends. Maybe it's just me. Maybe those are the sorts of things you want to know about before hand so you can dodge the proverbial bullet, so to speak. It's hard to say. I'm on the fence about these sorts of things, myself. On one hand, I like to know what I'm getting in to, on the other, sometimes there's such thing as too much information.
There is another aspect that you need to consider, and that is your personal comfort with meeting people in person for the first time. A good tip for those of you who want to go ahead with online dating, but are worried about that: tell a friend of yours where you'll be, who you'll be with and keep your cellphone on. The same thing your parents would have insisted still works, folks. I am stressing here to meet in a public place the whole time, like a restaurant, a movie theatre, and a crowded street, whatever. If it's appropriate, I'll even bring a friend along and encourage them to do the same. Avoid totally free dating sites. You will find more predators in totally free dating sites because they can contact you with a totally assumed alias. Paid sites are more difficult for predators to use bogus information on, so they usually avoid them
Other than that, I can only say good things about meeting people online. If you take the right precautions, you can have a great time. There's also the added mystery: what do they sound like (unless you have already seen them via anonymous video chat), what will they be wearing? I am also always nervous as to how I will measure up in turn. From my perspective though, this is nothing more than I experience when walking up to a hot somebody in a bar and introducing myself.
I find that meeting people online is a lot easier, and from my perspective, better. Aside of the initial pre-contact screening where you filter out people with three eyes and stuff, people using online dating sites tend to focus on the intellect and communication first and foremost. This may be largely because you cannot be influenced by pheromones, ambiance, or clothing which might draw you into a relationship with someone that you are just not intellectually compatible with. The length of time that people will communicate online before making the decision to meet in person varies widely. I have found however that people who wait too long will often find the other party either lose interest or else they get involved with someone else while they are chatting you up for weeks. There is a middle place where you are safe, but not seen as boringly cautious. Personally, I really like the conversations when you first start talking to someone online. There is just so much to learn about them and there is so much for them to learn about you. This is also a good time to look for inconsistencies in what they say, because that is a sure sign of someone to be wary of.
I've actually met more friends online dating than actual dates. Maybe it seems odd, but I've always personally valued a friend with common interests than a date, any day. In a real way though, whatever sort of person you're interested in meeting, friend, date, husband/wife, whatever, online is a great way to go. With all the free online dating sites and common interest forums, you can find whoever you're looking for.
The Internet has given us online dating and online chatting for a reason. Maybe in some ways it seems too new and frightening in it's own degree but so many people are involved in it now. If it's a trend, it's not one that will be fading out fast and you'll meet tons of people that will swear by it as the perfect way to meet a casual date, a soul mate, a best friend etc. If you stay cautious about it, it's good to give it a shot at least once in your life. As for my vote, you've got it.
If you are interested in online dating sites, but are not sure where to start, then check out this link: