Saturday, November 26, 2011

Why Use an Online Dating Site

You just have to love one of the best aspects of the Internet, and that is Online Dating. If you think about it (I mean, really think about it) it almost makes things too easy. In fact, you can browse profiles, short list the ones who interest you, and even lurk on chat rooms to see how they interact with other people before you even have to make any overtures in direct communication. No awkward conversation at bars, no “trying to get out of it”, nothing. You no longer have to dodge the "just before closing time" desperation moves from people that you would just as soon avoid. Even better is the fact that if you have a bad reaction to them you do not have to take pains to hide your feelings from showing on your face.

One thing that baffles me about online dating, unlike dating, is how brash and open the profiles are. You will find that many people who join an online dating site will give you a full discourse on their personal lives and desires. Maybe it's just me. Maybe those are the sorts of things you want to know about before hand so you can dodge the proverbial bullet, so to speak. It's hard to say. I'm on the fence about these sorts of things, myself. On one hand, I like to know what I'm getting in to, on the other, sometimes there's such thing as too much information.

Then there's the aspect of comfort. How comfortable are you, meeting people you've never met in person? I guess it depends on the person. When it comes to me, I tend to be paranoid and trusting at the same time. As in, I'll go and meet them, but I'll keep my distance.  Thousands of people meet through dating sites every day with no issues, but it is still best to take precautions. Take your cell phone and leave it on. Put 911 on speed dial. Tell friends and family where you will be and for what reason. Make sure you meet in a public place, and do not go anywhere alone with them the first time out. Best to be just meeting over a coffee rather than for a full blown date the first time you get together with someone. The same thing your parents would have insisted still works, folks. I am stressing here to meet in a public place the whole time, like a restaurant, a movie theatre, and a crowded street, whatever. If it's appropriate, I'll even bring a friend along and encourage them to do the same. To be doubly sure, stay away from totally free dating sites like OK cupid or Plentyoffish. Not that they are bad in themselves, but if you stick to sites where people have to pay to join, there is less chance of running into a molester. Paying just leaves an easy financial footprint for police to follow, so predators tend to avoid paid sites

Other than that, I can only say good things about meeting people online. If you take the right precautions, you can have a great time. Meeting people in person for the first time is always a bit of a rush. I mean, you think you know them pretty good by this point, but you can always be surprised. I met someone once with a distinctive body odor that I could not get past. Not hold your nose BO, but rather some subtle scent that may have been genetic or something that they ate regularly. Either way, it was a turn off for me even though I liked them? I'm always super-nervous at first, myself, but it tends to wear off within a few minutes. From my perspective though, this is nothing more than I experience when walking up to a hot somebody in a bar and introducing myself.

I find that meeting people online is a lot easier, and from my perspective, better. Dating sites tend to be less about looks and more about compatibility of interests and thinking. Most people will meet someone for the first time within a window of 2 to 6 weeks or so. Going to fast is dangerous, and waiting too long will likely result in never meeting them at all. Personally, I really like the conversations when you first start talking to someone online. There is just so much to learn about them and there is so much for them to learn about you. This is also a good time to look for inconsistencies in what they say, because that is a sure sign of someone to be wary of.

Sometimes meeting an interesting person face to face for the first time ends up in disappointment. No spark! Often though, these people end up being really good friends because there is just so many other things that you have in common. No matter what you are looking for, you are sure to find someone who meets your laundry list on an online dating site, especially if you are like most people and join more than one.

The greatest gift that the Internet has given mankind is the ability to communicate with people easily. In past generations, when people moved apart, relationships stagnated and went dormant. This is no longer true. In fact the Internet has people communicating on a regular basis who have never met, nor are likely to meet in person. All of those reasons were why online dating sites exploded on the Internet. The Internet is not going away any time soon and neither are online dating sites. So it is nice to know that no matter what you are looking for, or the stage in life when you are looking, that those online dating sites will be patiently waiting to connect you to someone. Go Get Them!

If you are interested in online dating sites, but are not sure where to start, then check out this link:

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